BABIES

The new year. Lying under soft sheets, the memory of every divine little tear-drop that has slipped down my cheek on my mind. All those precious, little quiet sobs. So silent someone laid right next to me wouldn’t even stir for them.

Oh, and how I recall all the beautiful boys in coffee houses with skillfully quiff-ed hair reminiscent of my first love, and those rebels with beards. All the anticipation of roughhousing! Demi-gods, we thought. Aglow with something superior. Game players we presumed! All the jpegs exchanged in the past year, the mutual and simultaneous awe. Fuck. A fine catalogue of smut, for the eyes of foolish ones. A full springtime full of Valium and wishful thinking, and all those dirty little challenges - sick. All the slut smirks we choose to spend our time with instead. A sticky summer.

‘Where is your girlfriend now!’ I wanted to shout across the blackened floor, instead I just smiled to myself and brushed past you delicately, because my attention is no longer yours. Absence breeds regret, because all of the dishonourable ones will regret it one day - and that is our revenge. Forever sweet. Twelve months and a myriad of emotions. All the fucking and fighting.

“How many?” my soul babe asked. and together we counted all those boys on our dainty feminine fingers.

@April